Godly discipline is parents' way of showing love to their children in the sense that it trains them to have proper character and thinking. Christ-centered discipline banks on the belief that our children are sinful just as we are and need the grace of correction to be led to the right path just like we do.
We learn that the best way to discipline can be exemplified in the way that God disciplines us, and when God disciplines us it's always for our good. God never disciplines for His own pleasure because He is not a sadistic God that disciplines to get back at us. God does not need our performance to be assured of His position or glory. He is glorious with or without us.
Hebrews 12:7 tells us, "It is for discipline that you endure; God deals with you as with sons; for what son is there whom his father does not discipline?" Discipline is always for the good of the one who receives it, not necessarily for the one who dishes it out.
What can we as parents learn from this attribute of God? We can learn that as we discipline our children, it is not for our good but for theirs. So many parents now -- even Christian parents -- have made an idol out of discipline and it is turning our children into broken, confused and sometimes even monstrous people.
Discipline is not for our image, but for our children's reproof
For some parents, discipline is a way of looking good to their friends, churchmates or people at the grocery store. They make it too much about their reputation because they want to look like "good parents." When this becomes the motive, we may get the results we want but the heart is not in the right place.
Proverbs 3:12 says, "For whom the LORD loves He reproves, Even as a father corrects the son in whom he delights." God disciplines for our good, not His. We, too, as loving parents should check our hearts and have the Holy Spirit direct them to the right path if we're disciplining just because we don't want to get humiliated.
Discipline points children to love and compassion
The difference between punishment and discipline is that discipline is mixed with a good amount of assurance and restoration while punishment is not. No doubt, discipline should bring about a fear of the Lord into our children's lives, but it should be balanced by compassion and love.
Often punishment can be revenge-driven and not love-driven. Punishment is an outcome of a poor framework of the understanding of the cross. When we truly realize what Jesus has done for our children -- dying for them on the cross and bringing forth the Spirit of God upon them -- we will act in love and compassion.
