Marriage can seem like a lot of work because even the little things that we do can have the biggest effects. The seemingly insignificant mistakes, events and even words can have the biggest impacts.
Although action always trumps words in any relationship, most actions begin with a word or promise given and then we follow through with the enabling power of God. The words we say may not seem to be very important, but deep down we know that we as human beings are triggered by ideas, affections and decisions communicated through words.
Proverbs 18:20-21 reminds us, "From the fruit of a man's mouth his stomach is satisfied; he is satisfied by the yield of his lips. Death and life are in the power of the tongue, and those who love it will eat its fruits."
The life you speak into your marriage can very well be the source of God-given life that your spouse badly needs.
"I love you."
Throughout scripture, God used prophetic and personal words that would affirm His love for the world. The principle is no different for marriages. There is power behind repeatedly and constantly speaking of your love and affection to your spouse.
"God's in charge."
Ecclesiastes 4:12 says, "And though a man might prevail against one who is alone, two will withstand him—a threefold cord is not quickly broken." Because of this, we need to be reminded daily of who's in charge and who calls the shots in a relationship.
And who better to remind you of God's sovereignty and providence over your relationship than your spouse? When we remind our spouses that God's in charge, we also remind ourselves of the same thing.
"How can I serve you today?"
I was once told that marriage is about reciprocity, which is true, but we can never demand service from one another. To have to constantly do so can actually be more taxing and stressful in the long run. Instead, we are to readily give service to our spouses, standing in faith that they will serve us back.
"You're special."
God tells us everyday how special we are. Through the provision of oxygen, food, energy and even life itself, we are reminded that God holds us in the highest regards. He can do fine without us, but still He chooses to have us close to Him.
In the same way, God calls both husband and wife to affirm to each other that value that we have, not just in each other but in God's eyes as well.
