Just yesterday we lost a very good friend in the ministry to cardiac arrest. Jepoy, as we all loved calling our friend, was only in his early twenties and was studying to be a doctor. His death was sudden, unexpected and all too tragic. During our staff meeting at church yesterday, there was just stillness and tears as we worshipped God.
In my life, I've seen a good amount of premature deaths. I lost my mother to cancer when she was just 41, a mentor and good friend to a fatal car crash when he was only 31, and now this recent death of a good friend. How do you get back up from a devastating loss?
Not all deaths will have meaning at that very instant. But it all starts with knowing that in God's eyes there is just as much meaning to every death as there is to every life. Job's character shows what it truly is to understand God's sovereignty as he said, "Naked I came from my mother's womb, and naked shall I return. The LORD gave, and the LORD has taken away; blessed be the name of the LORD." (Job 1:21)
In times of loss, we can react to and manage the pain of grief by doing two things: looking forward and looking back.
When we look forward after death, what do you see? Do you see endless pain? As much as it feels like it, we don't. We know that the pain and suffering of grief will only last a fortnight painted against the tapestry of eternity.
There will be rejoicing once again because we serve a God who has already won it all and conquered the sting of death once and for all. When we look forward to the hope that is in Christ, we find that while there is sorrow in the night, joy will come in the morning. (Psalm 30:5)
When we look back after death, what do you see? Do you see time and opportunity wasted? Again, as much as it feels like it, we just don't. Looking back at a life lived and lost can bring to mind so much to be grateful for. We are to be grateful for life itself, grateful for the fact that this age will pass and this pain will be no more, and grateful for what God has allowed us to experience here on earth.
Loss can be tough, but looking forward to God's hope and not to future pain and then looking back with gratitude and not remorse helps us to get back on our feet when we experience grief and turn our mourning into dancing.
