E! TV host Giuliana Rancic revealed in a recent interview that her very public battle with fertility caused her to question God.
Although she and her husband, Bill, are devout Christians, she said that her struggle to have children was difficult physically, emotionally, and spiritually.
The couple's fertility issues have been chronicled on their reality show, "Guiliana and Bill," which airs on the E! network.
After difficulties conceiving naturally, the Rancics began IVF treatment in March 2010. Giuliana became pregnant, but miscarried at nine weeks. A second round of IVF was unsuccessful, and the entertainment reporter admitted that she began to ask "Why me?"
"It was hard," she told the Daily Mail. "Also, my sister has four children and I come from a big family, so it was heart-wrenching not to be able to have a child.
"My faith is strong and Bill and I go to church every Sunday, but I remember going to church and getting angry. I was asking God, 'Why aren't you giving us a child?'"
Giuliana's doctor ordered a mammogram before they began a third round of IVF. The test showed she had early stage breast cancer, and in December 2011 she underwent a double mastectomy. If she did not have difficulty conceiving, Giuliana said, the cancer could have remained undetected for years.
"I would have been like many women who get their first mammogram at 40, but because I had the type of cancer that accelerates quickly, I might not have found it early enough and I might not be here today," she explained.
"It's incredible how life works out.
"Sometimes the hardest things in life are there to bring about the best things."
Giuliana, 40, is now cancer-free, and the couple welcomed their son, Duke, through a surrogate in 2012.
A second surrogate pregnancy ended in miscarriage earlier this year, but the "Fashion Police" host has not ruled out trying for more children.
"We're thinking about it," she said. "We had to take a little break because it's so emotionally draining, but I'm hoping it'll be before the end of the year."
The couple are also considering adoption.
"I think adoption creates even more of a special bond between the child and parents because a child is coming into your family," she intimated. "I think that brings a different level of love."
For now, she is enjoying each day as it comes.
"I love my life and I'm just happy to be alive," Giuliana said.
