One church mom is pleading with parents to teach their kids not to point and stare at those who look different after claiming she had to take her special needs son out of a children's church session because the reaction to his appearance was so bad.
Stacey Jackson Gagnon took to Facebook to describe her recent experience at a new church and what she says happened when she took her son Joel to its children's church. She doesn't name the church in question but says her family were there because her eldest son was giving a talk.
Joel was born with a cranio-facial impairment that means he is 'missing an ear and some bone structure.' To his family, he is a beautiful and loving boy and they don't even notice his impairment - four out of the family's six children have special needs.
They're also used to the reactions of others and Stacey said in the viral post that she normally uses kids' shocked reactions as a teaching opportunity to talk to them about how they should treat people who look different.
She explains, though, that during a recent visit to a new church she didn't feel able to do that this time round.
'The minute we walked inside, the room became silent and every child stared or pointed at my son, Joel' she describes.
'I know he looks different, but today hurt. I stood at the door and watched every child look with eyes wide and mouths open at my child. I stepped in and was about to address the entire class about differences; but then I stopped. I stopped and looked to the back of the room where my son had fled to hide. He had buried his head in his arms because you cannot hide in plain sight.'
So instead of taking a moment to teach the staring kids as she would normally do, she asked Joel if he wanted to leave. His answer was yes and he 'stood and ran from the room,' she says.
'I held him in my arms during church and he drew 'Joel loves Mom' on my palm. Tears welled in my throat. My beautiful and loving son deserves so much more than stares and pointing,' Stacey wrote.
But it's not the kids she's upset with - her issue is more with the parents.
'I am not angry. I do not think these were bad, mean children. I think no one has ever taught them,' she said.
In the lengthy post that has now been shared over 25,000 times, Stacey begs parents to teach their children that many people look different but on the inside they're just the same.
She says parents need to teach their kids what they should do when they see people who are different - find out what they have in common instead of staring at them.
'So I ask all parents this, teach your children. Teach your children that many people look different. Show them pictures of people that look different. And then explain that it is not okay to stare at someone that looks different, it's not okay to point,' she said.
'Teach them that my boy is the same on the inside as your child is. He loves Dodge Ram trucks, and Minecraft, and digging in the dirt. He loves ketchup, but does not love broccoli.'
Stacey shared some practical things parents can do, like showing them pictures of people who use wheelchairs or walkers, or who have different facial features or physical attributes.
She ends by saying: 'Show them children with no hair, without an ear, without an arm. Take a moment and share all kinds of different. Now teach your child that a beautiful person is found with the heart; not the eyes.'
