Katy Garner thought she had received a death sentence when she found a lump near her groin seven years ago.
When tests confirmed she had secondary melonoma cancer the trainee vicar from Portsmouth said she "sank into a bit of a hole". In an interview with Christian Today, Garner, who will be ordained on July 2, praised God's faithfulness throughout her journey.
"God walks with me. God is someone you can talk to and scream at. He is always the same. He is always faithful.
"There have been times when I have wondered where he is because he has not felt present. But I know it's not him but me who has not let him be present," she told Christian Today.
"I have no answer to the question of God and suffering," she said. "But I know my journey has been made easier by walking with God."
"The times I feel God has been distant have been the most difficult but that is because I had put a block on him."
She was first diagnosed in 2009 but after an operation she was declared cancer free. However in 2015, as she was mid way through her training for ordination, Garner felt a second lump.
"I knew what it was," she said. "Of course I hoped I was wrong but when the results came through I was not surprised." She said despite being "very cross", she had learnt to be much more hopeful the second time.
"The most important thing you can do is stay positive," she told Christian Today. "Research shows that is the best way to fight it."
Although she doesn't describe herself as cured, she is in remission thanks to a new treatment still on trial in the UK. Garner will feature in a BBC documentary on Wednesday night to share her story on The Big C and Me.
She believes her struggle with cancer will help in her future ministry.
"He [God] wouldn't have called me to this unless he was going to give me the resources to see it through," she said.
"And when you have been to the brink and back, and you have experience of what living with cancer is like, it does help you to minister to others.
"I haven't got the answer about why God allows suffering, but cancer has not made me lose my faith. You have to work through these questions, and I believe that a journey through difficult times can actually strengthen your faith."
After her ordination by the Bishop of Portsmouth, Garner will take up a position as a curate for the villages of West Meon, Warnford, East Meon and Langrish, near Petersfield.
"Faith is a journey and does involve doubts," she said. "But that does make you revisit the Bible. I've found that it has made me ask questions, and that has meant a more permanent and beautiful relationship with God. I see God in this situation and I couldn't have walked this journey without him."
The Big C and Me will air on BBC 1 on Wednesday night.
