God designed marriage to be a wonderful way of life in the pursuit of His will. God gave us our spouses to show us how much He loves us and to teach us how we should be like: Christ-like.
"Therefore be imitators of God as dear children. And walk in love, as Christ also has loved us and given Himself for us, an offering and a sacrifice to God for a sweet-smelling aroma." (Ephesians 5:1-2)
As we think of what it's like to be a Christ-like husband or wife, we would do well to look at our very Lord and Savior "who, being in the form of God, did not consider it robbery to be equal with God, but made Himself of no reputation, taking the form of a bondservant, and coming in the likeness of men" (see Philippians 2:6).
Here are a few great qualities every Christian husband or wife should have, in light of Christ.
Qualities of a great Christian spouse
1) Confident of his/her identity in Christ, but not arrogant or proud
Jesus Christ the Lord is God's only begotten Son, but that didn't blow up His head like helium in a balloon. He knew that was His identity, but He didn't boast about it.
Rather, because He is God's Son sent to save the world, He remained confident in God's love and served us all.
A Christ-like spouse will also do the same. Christ-like husbands wouldn't mind putting themselves at the bottom of the list in order to protect, cherish, and serve their wives. And Christ-like wives wouldn't mind respecting and serving their husbands, imperfections included.
2) Gracious and patient like Jesus
Every spouse has their own shortcomings and difficulties, and a gracious and patient spouse will be a blessing indeed.
2 Peter 3:15 tells us that "the longsuffering of our Lord is salvation" for all of us. This salvation was brought about because:
"Surely He has borne our griefs and carried our sorrows; Yet we esteemed Him stricken, smitten by God, and afflicted. But He was wounded for our transgressions, He was bruised for our iniquities; The chastisement for our peace was upon Him, and by His stripes we are healed. All we like sheep have gone astray; We have turned, every one, to his own way; And the Lord has laid on Him the iniquity of us all." (Isaiah 53:4-6)
Some of us might argue that we're not bad people, but we're wrong. "There is none righteous, no, not one; There is none who understands; There is none who seeks after God." (see Romans 3:10-11)
"But God demonstrates His own love toward us, in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us." (Romans 5:8)
Because we are told to love one another like Christ loved us, we ought to love our spouses like Christ loved us. We need to love one another despite our imperfections, shortcomings and flaws.
3) Loves God above all
Christ loved us alright, but He loved the Father above all. He Himself taught us that:
"Jesus said to him, "'You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart, with all your soul, and with all your mind.' This is the first and great commandment. And the second is like it: 'You shall love your neighbor as yourself.' On these two commandments hang all the Law and the Prophets."" (see Matthew 22:37-40)
Any God-fearing husband who is Christ-like in his love for his wife will love God more than he loves his wife. The same goes for God-fearing and Christ-like wives.
Our love for our spouses must never overtake our love for God. He must always be over and above our marriages, and our marriages should always be second only to Him. When we do this, we'll see our marriages flourish with His blessing and goodness.
