I come from a spiritual tradition that tends to let it all hang out when we pray. That felt natural to me – I am a bit of a talker. I was also a late convert so finding that prayer involved being conversational with God played well with me.
And now as a parish priest I find the whole structure of our worship service tends to back up the talking model. Each week someone comes up and brings a set of intercessions for God. Many times these are touching and powerful.
But in my private prayer time something else has been happening. I've tended to find my self sitting for long periods in silence. I just sit in my comfortable office chair, close my eyes and 'be'. To begin with I felt a bit guilty about this, as though I was being lazy and letting the side down. But as the days went on I began to look forward to these quiet times and more than that I began to get a strong sense of God in them. It felt as though the journey into God can be a journey into silence – and silence is quite different from absence.
This Sunday at church our intercessor was taken ill at late notice and we had our worship leader ill as well. We were short handed, that's for sure – but when you're short handed then it gives a chance for God to get more involved.
As I began the service I remember thinking how we didn't want to short-change people. But it was then that something amazing happened.
When we got to the intercessions slot, I explained that we were going to do something different this week. I explained that we would begin by closing our eyes and simply breathing in and out as asking the Holy Spirit to be close.
Within seconds, I was struck by such a profound sense of peace that I was barely able to open my eyes. After I while I squeezed my eyes open and to my amazement the whole congregation seemed also to be wrapped in peace and silence.
I think I said a few words to encourage people to continue feeling the presence of the Holy Spirit and simply to enjoy his beautiful company. It was certainly a holy moment. I think that none of us wanted it to end.
After the service I was surrounded by people asking what had happened and could we do it again? Of course, it was God who did it, but it was such a lesson for me as a church leader.
There is a profound and beautiful silence at the heart of God. Perhaps that's part of God's mystery. I think that in the early days of my leadership I would not have been brave enough to do nothing at a main Sunday service. Perhaps we should do nothing a great deal more often.
Rev Steve Morris is the parish priest of St Cuthbert's North Wembley. Before being a priest he was a writer and ran a brand agency. In the 1980s he tried to become a pop star. Follow him on Twitter @SteveMorris214
