We all deal with the loss of a friend some time in our lives. It's very sad to get separated from dear friends whom we have loved and treated as our own brothers. Whether we lose them literally or figuratively, it's a sad thing.
But how do we deal with the loss? I hope to encourage you, dear friends. God has a plan, and we will do well to trust Him.
Ways we lose friends
There are several ways we lose our friends: death, physical separation, and a literal parting of ways. The first means we won't ever see them again in this life, the second means we won't see each other anymore even if we're still alive, and the third means saying goodbye and cutting off ties because we can't walk with them any longer.
Regardless of the way we lose them, it's still painful. But I hope to help you cope and heal with the specific loss you experience.
Here's how you can deal with the loss of a friend.
1) When a friend dies
The Bible tells us that life is short. Our lives are fleeting as grass. We don't even know if we'll live tomorrow. That said, we should be prepared for it.
When our friends die, it will always be a painful separation. Death is not a pleasant thing because the living will always be left behind coping with the loss. The living, however, should not lose hope.
If a friend dies, then don't repress the sadness. We can mourn if we have to. Cry unto God for healing. David lost his dear friend Jonathan, and he dealt with his loss by thanking God for such a dear brother in the Lord:
"I am distressed for you, my brother Jonathan; You have been very pleasant to me; Your love to me was wonderful, surpassing the love of women." (2 Samuel 1:26)
2) When you are physically separated with no hope of seeing each other again
There are times when we just have to let our friends go. Either they or we leave and migrate to another place. When this happens, we should not let our lives stop. Life must go on.
Friends, when God allows us to be separated from our friends, He has his purposes. Let's thank Him for the friendship He allowed us to have with our friends, but let us not get mad at Him for the separation. It will be for our own good.
Don't deny the sadness, but don't wallow in it either. Like Job, let us declare,
"The Lord gave, and the Lord has taken away; Blessed be the name of the Lord." (see Job 1:21)
3) When you have to part ways with a friend.
Lastly, there will be times when we will need to part ways with our friends. It may be because of disagreements or fights, but I hope that if these are the only reasons, there would be reconciliation.
But when the reason becomes choosing between the Lord and that friend, I pray that we'd always choose the Lord.
Consider Samuel. He was the one who God used to appoint Saul as king over Israel. When God wanted a new king in Saul's place, however, Samuel had to leave.
While he was mourning for Saul, God even stopped him because He had already chosen someone else: David.
Now let's consider David, who also had to flee from King Saul because the latter wanted him dead. David had no choice but to leave Jonathan behind as he pursued God's desire for him. Should David stay beside Jonathan and risk dying before God could set Him up as king of Israel? Or should he leave and pursue God's will for him?
Now, consider those who we consider as friends. Do we have the same love for God? If not, then maybe we should reconsider who we allow to influence us. Amos 3:3 tells us,
"Can two walk together, unless they are agreed?"
In closing
Friends, let us let God be number one in our lives. He must be above our friends, no matter what happens. We might lose a friend or two, even all of them, but God will remain. He will never leave us, nor forsake us.
