A lot of women find it difficult to deal with their emotions, particularly anger, but Christian author Kimberly Taylor says there are actually godly ways to handle it.
"Anger occurs when you feel like your rights have been violated, your expectations have not been met, or you are outraged about an injustice that involves others," she writes in an article for Charisma News. "Even God the Father and Jesus expressed anger."
However, most women prefer to keep their mouths closed despite feeling angry, then silently seethe inside until it boils over. More often than not, the women themselves and those who are closest to them get burned.
"While anger itself is not a sin, there are godly and ungodly ways to deal with it," says Taylor. "Our heart should always be set on peace — peace with God, peace with ourselves, and peace with our fellow man as we are in position to make it."
Taylor clarifies that it is okay to feel the emotion of anger, but it is important to assess it honestly and discover if there is a cause for it.
"If you are angry and can't identify a reason for it, consider it an attack from the enemy. Submit your feelings to God in prayer or even write Him a letter about it," she suggests. "Ask God to open up your spiritual eyes so that you can see the truth of what is happening. Believe that you have God's peace within and pursue that peace rather than indulging your flesh through unwarranted anger."
If anger does have a cause, Taylor said that the next questions to be asked should be: "How have my expectations not been met?" or "how do I feel my rights have been violated?"
Taylor says sometimes people have expectations, but the other person they are dealing with has no idea of their expectations. She says people cannot read minds, so it is essential to let the other person be aware of one's expectations before feeling angry.
"If they lack knowledge about how to meet your expectations, could you supply the knowledge to assist them? If they lack the will, then you have a decision to make. Depending on the relationship, you may decide to limit your association with them or lower your expectations," she says.
If rights have been violated, Taylor says people should be assertive with the other person and state the facts about what happened and then set boundaries regarding the expected behavior.
"Once again, your goal is to make peace so that a spirit of offense will not take hold. You don't want to act in a way that will be a stumbling block to someone else coming to the Lord," she explains.
And if people feel angry about an injustice that does not involve them directly, then the best thing to do would be to pray to God about the situation. God will help people reflect if there is anything they can do about the situation, and if yes, people should pray to Him for courage and resources to take action.
