"And [Jesus] answered and said to them, "Have you not read that He who made them at the beginning 'made them male and female,' and said, 'For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh'? So then, they are no longer two but one flesh. Therefore what God has joined together, let not man separate."" - Matthew 19:4-6
Every newlywed couple has a lot of things to learn and enjoy ahead of them. They will see life's beautiful twists and turns, as well as its challenging but rewarding uphills and downhills. The best part about it? They get to enjoy all of it together as a married couple.
Are you a newlywed husband or wife looking forward to enjoying a happy marriage with the spouse God gave you? If you are, I have some things to share with you.
From a once-newlywed husband to a newlywed couple
Dear friend, marriage is a great and very enjoyable thing, as long as you live it according to God's design. I can say from experience that it's truly a blissful thing, something so precious I won't trade it for anything. It's far more precious than any other human relationship we will ever have on earth.
That said, every couple will do well to nurture it, protect it, and keep it growing. It takes effort coming from a lot of love to do it.
To help you get on the right track as you start a new life with your spouse, here are a few things you need to keep in mind, especially during the first year of marriage.
1) Establish the right foundations early
Did you know that the first year of marriage is very important? Many take a break from work to have a month-long honeymoon, thinking that a month is enough, but it's not.
God knows just how important it is to take enough time to establish the right foundations: love, contentment and happiness with each other, and adjusting to one another. In Deuteronomy 24:5 we read Him say,
"When a man has taken a new wife, he shall not go out to war or be charged with any business; he shall be free at home one year, and bring happiness to his wife whom he has taken."
Newlywed husbands ought to know that the wife is utmost importance, next only to God and Jesus Christ. Wives ought to know that the husband is of utmost importance, too.
2) Learn to close doors that need to be closed
Marriage is the start of a new chapter in your life. This is a time when you get to see new doors open for you, as well as a time for you to close doors that need to be closed. You've got to ask God for wisdom what to open and enter, and what to leave and shut.
Let me be frank about this, friends: as newlywed couples, you can't afford to let other people in your marriage. You've got to close the door on some people in your life. Husbands will do well to say goodbye to female friends, and wives will do well to say goodbye to male friends. It's an unspoken rule.
Now that you're married, your first friend will be your spouse.
3) Fights and arguments are normal, but need to be resolved in light of God's word
Lastly, dear newlyweds, avoid imagining a marriage relationship without any fight or disagreement. Every marriage will have its own issues, especially during the first year as you adjust to each other.
Don't be discouraged into thinking that your spouse doesn't love you. You just need to learn to adjust to one another, so that you can live together better. As you love one another and seek to understand and serve each other, you'll learn to adjust well. Just be patient. Proverbs 27:17 says,
"As iron sharpens iron, so a man sharpens the countenance of his friend"
The best marriages are the ones where the husband and the wife faithfully fulfill their vows on a daily basis. Don't ever forget your vows. Keep them "till death do [you] part."
