Marriage offers a friendship like no other. God designed marriage to be enjoyable for both the husband and the wife—if it is done the right way. If you are a husband and want your marriage to be happy, I have something to share to you; read on.
Befriending your wife
Guys, God knows that it's not good for us to be alone, and so He made our wives to be with us. The woman we marry at the marriage altar isn't a trophy, and neither is she a second-class citizen, someone we will go to only when we need to. That's so rude.
We must understand that if we want our marriage to be successful, we need to befriend our wife and be loyal to her. This loyalty includes being faithful to her alone and not giving room for other unwanted or inappropriate relationships with other women.
Proverbs 5 gives us great wisdom about this matter:
"Let your wife be a fountain of blessing for you. Rejoice in the wife of your youth." (Proverbs 5:18 NLT)
Fellow husbands, we must learn to rejoice in our respective wives. We must cultivate our relationship with them, the woman we committed to love until death parts us.
This brings me to the question posed in this article's title. Is it OK for a married Christian man to hang out with women without his wife being there? Before I answer that, let's go over a few important matters that will help us.
Hanging out with others
I have heard of some beloved brothers complaining about their wives. Frankly, I know it's a common thing: a man wants to hang out with his female friends, but his wife doesn't want it and complains about it. Can you relate?
First of all, I won't judge you if you're that man, but the Bible does tell us that if a man marries, he will forsake other relationships in favour of his wife. Yes, this includes more than just our parents – it includes other women as well.
Second, if you want to hang out with other women, better ask yourself, "Why?" Is your wife's friendship with you not enough to satisfy your longing for a friend? If it's not, then why not build your marriage relationship up instead of looking for another woman to hang out with? Proverbs 5:15 reminds us to "drink waters out of [our] own cistern."
Third, why would you hang out with other women without your wife? Men, we're told to love our wives like Christ loved the church. He never took His focus off His Bride, and will come back for her. His attention is on her, and so should our attention be to our wives.
Lastly, I would like to discourage all married men from hanging out with other women, whether they tell that to their wives or not. Truth is that even if our wives keep silent about it, they will not want us to hang out with other women, especially without them. It hurts them.
We must never give room for ourselves to wander, for our wives to doubt, and for other women to think that our wives aren't enough for us. We must be careful to catch the little foxes for they will ruin our vineyard of love (see Song of Solomon 2:15).
Love your wife
Brothers, let's love our wives. If we feel like we are forbidden from having any friendship with another woman, let's not become bitter (see Colossians 3:19). Instead, let's realise that our wives are our priority, far above other people around us.
