Rick Warren says true friends interested in other people's lives, show up physically and not just in spirit

To Pastor Rick Warren, saying ‘I'll be with you in spirit' means nothing since it’s just ‘a bunch of bologna.’ (Facebook/Rick Warren)

Pastor Rick Warren of Saddleback Church says it is not easy maintaining friendships, because people have to be purposeful and intentional about keeping their circle of friends.

"The starting point of building great friendships is investing your time and energy. Deep friendships are not accidental. They are not instant. And they are not cheap," he writes on his website. "Deep friendships are...a choice."

The key to establishing friendships is to start getting interested in other people's lives. In fact, Warren says in doing so, people will "make more friends in the next two months than you would in two years of trying to get other people interested in you."

Even Philippians 2:4 says so: "Do not be interested only in your own life, but be interested in the lives of others."

After the friendship has been established, Warren says the only way for it to grow is for people to be physically present in their friends' lives. If people don't "show up" for their friends, Warren says they'll revert to being mere acquaintances.

"Just show up. Physical presence is essential to having a long-term, deep friendship instead of an acquaintance," he explains. "When somebody says to you, 'You know that small group this week? I'll be with you in spirit,' you know what that means? Nothing! It's a bunch of bologna. You can't be in spirit anywhere. If you're not there in body, you [aren't] there. Friends show up. They're present."

Meanwhile, Warren also has some advice on how people should build their family legacies. The "Purpose Driven Life" author believes that "awesome families" dedicate their time in showing love to their neighbours and doing charitable acts.

"Awesome families teach their kids that they're not the center of the universe. They teach their kids that God made them and shaped them for a mission. They model dedication, service, generosity, and prayer. Average families don't do those things. Awesome families do," he says.

related articles
Pastor Rick Warren shows how to stay enthusiastic every day, says positive thinking is not enough
Pastor Rick Warren shows how to stay enthusiastic every day, says positive thinking is not enough

Pastor Rick Warren shows how to stay enthusiastic every day, says positive thinking is not enough

Rick Warren says people\'s thoughts shape their lives: \'Be careful what you think\'
Rick Warren says people's thoughts shape their lives: 'Be careful what you think'

Rick Warren says people's thoughts shape their lives: 'Be careful what you think'

Forgive and forget? Pastor Rick Warren says it\'s \'impossible\' to do as he shows a better way to deal with past hurts
Forgive and forget? Pastor Rick Warren says it's 'impossible' to do as he shows a better way to deal with past hurts

Forgive and forget? Pastor Rick Warren says it's 'impossible' to do as he shows a better way to deal with past hurts

Why did God create Adam first before Eve? Pastor Rick Warren explains
Why did God create Adam first before Eve? Pastor Rick Warren explains

Why did God create Adam first before Eve? Pastor Rick Warren explains

Rick Warren advises quarrelling couple: Don\'t split up; think of your kids\' welfare
Rick Warren advises quarrelling couple: Don't split up; think of your kids' welfare

Rick Warren advises quarrelling couple: Don't split up; think of your kids' welfare

News
13 Christians abducted in church attack in Nigeria
13 Christians abducted in church attack in Nigeria

Thirteen Christians have been abducted by a militia group in Nigeria following a skirmish in Kogi State.

Former moderator of Church of Scotland teams up with pop star to release Christmas song
Former moderator of Church of Scotland teams up with pop star to release Christmas song

What do you do when you've retired from leading a church?

Christians protest LGBT nativity play where Jesus is 'King of the Gays'
Christians protest LGBT nativity play where Jesus is 'King of the Gays'

The university and students' union said the play was within the bounds of free speech laws.

Pro-life campaigner who silently prayed in abortion clinic buffer zone criminally charged
Pro-life campaigner who silently prayed in abortion clinic buffer zone criminally charged

A pro-life campaigner who silently prayed near an abortion clinic in Birmingham has been criminally charged.