Helping people get out of sinful patterns can seem like a daunting task, but in it's fullest essence, it's not rocket science, really.
Counselling is not an easy ministry, and the baggage it brings can be quite overwhelming at times. However, it is not as complicated as it seems. When God calls Christian counsellors, He calls them into a wonderful work of liberating people and reconciling them with God.
The biggest mistake that many ministers make, however, is thinking that it's their expertise or knowledge that will help people out of their sin struggles. At the end of the day, the call to guide people is a call to give them good news, not good advice.
People who often think "it can't be that simple" most likely forget that the power of Jesus's finished work is more than enough. Ephesians 2:8 says, "For by grace you have been saved through faith. And this is not your own doing; it is the gift of God." There is a call for Christ-centered counsellors and a need to abolish moralistic ministering.
Here are some things we might say that create moralistic experiences instead of life-changing ones.
"You should do this..."
Galatians 2:16 reminds us, "know that a person is not justified by the works of the law, but by faith in Jesus Christ. So we, too, have put our faith in Christ Jesus that we may be justified by faith in Christ and not by the works of the law, because by the works of the law no one will be justified."
Being a counsellor is often not really about being good advice givers but more of pointing people to Christ in every situation.
"God isn't pleased with you."
Although God is never pleased with sin, God is not pleased with good works either. Hebrews 11:6 reminds us, "And without faith it is impossible to please him, for whoever would draw near to God must believe that he exists and that he rewards those who seek him."
Obedience is required in expressing faith, yes, but when obedience out of man's own will becomes the driving force, we only set people up for failure in terms of sins.
"I know how you feel."
While sometimes we might know how people feel, it's not what a lot of people need to hear. "I know what it's like to be an alcoholic" or "I feel your sexual struggles" can sometimes turn into excuses for people to just stay comfortable with their sin.
While this isn't always the case, we must constantly partner with God to lead us to what to say.
"You are ruining your life."
What we must understand is that no one wants to intentionally ruin their lives. People don't destroy their lives, sin does, and the damage and pain will go when the sin goes. However, when we imply to people that they are the problem, we only breed condemnation instead of conviction.
