Popular author and preacher Francis Chan was recently questioned by fellow pastors who are trying to get their heads around Chan's decision to leave his megachurch.
"I'll be honest. Everybody thinks you're cuckoo for cocoa puffs. You got a good church going on and you hit the eject button and now you're the international man of fu Manchu mystery," said Pastor Mark Driscoll of Mars Hill Church in Seattle.
"What is going on? What are you thinking?"
Chan announced in April that he would be letting go of Cornerstone Church in Simi Valley, California – a church he founded 16 years ago – to follow a stirring in his heart. He preached his last sermon there in May and has since been speaking to Christians and pastors alike about his restlessness with comfortable Christianity and his desire to surrender himself fully to God.
Responding to Driscoll during a frank discussion – that also included Pastor Joshua Harris of Gaithersburg, Maryland – about his decision, Chan said, "A lot of it is personal. A lot of it is when I look at the Scriptures I see this commitment, this devotion, this hardcore 'we will follow, we'll do anything, we're all about going out and making disciples.'"
He said he wanted to start over and get a core group of disciples who just try 100 per cent to follow the life he felt was clearly spelled out in Scripture.
"While I feel like I'm getting closer and closer to what the Spirit is leading me to do based on my convictions of Scripture, I don't think I can totally get there by constantly tweaking," he explained.
"I've read the Book. I got this theology in my head. I have all these thoughts and convictions. Let me just start something fresh with all of those convictions rather than constantly tweaking something that I may have possibly taken in the wrong direction for a little while."
Driscoll and Harris, who are council members of The Gospel Coalition, expressed some concern over starting something and leaving and wondered if he would repeat that pattern in the future.
"How long do you think you'll be at the new work before discontentment or frustration sets in because if I was in the core group I would ask that question. Is this a discontentedness in your soul that won't ever be satisfied?" the Mars Hill pastor asked.
Harris also offered, "If everybody out there just said 'hey, let me go start something new' ... that's an important thing to realise. We do need guys who are in an established church and go 'you know what, maybe it's not alright but here's how I can slowly over time build and redirect in certain ways and so on'."
While Chan cannot predict what will happen in the future, he said he doubts that he will go through what some see as a "crisis" again because he has felt this stirring since high school. He just never had the courage to say it out loud and to follow it.
"I don't know how to explain it other than there's always been this core conviction of 'something's not right and I think I know what it is but I'll just keep quiet'," he explained. "Now, I want to express it and live it and just go 'now, I believe I'm living in congruence with the whole New Testament'."
"Maybe I'm dreaming but I got to go for it."
He also stressed that his leaving Cornerstone was for the church's own good. "It's kind of diverting some of this 'I must hear from Francis'. By staying there, I was causing, not causing the whole problem but I wasn't helping the issue."
