Saying "no" is a powerful habit that will free most of us to do what we were meant to do. It's a two-letter word that enables us to live focused, stress-free lives. We need to master its use and know the art of using it.
Learning to say 'no'
Learning to say "no" is often not an easy task, most especially for those who don't like to offend other people. Paul foresaw this many years ago, and gave us a warning through 2 Timothy 3:1-2:
"But know this, that in the last days perilous times will come: For men will be lovers of themselves..."
Today's age indeed is a time when people show excessive love of themselves. Don't get me wrong: All people have loved themselves since the beginning of time. But there seem to be more conceited people today. Some get easily offended when they are denied their personal pleasures. Some hate being corrected and rebuked. Some are irked when they are blamed for their own mistakes. Sadly, some of these people even belong to the church.
But even if these people get offended, we all have to learn to say "no." We all need to set our limits and boundaries in obedience to God's Word.
Mastering the art of saying 'no'
We all have to learn to say "no" when we have to. We have to muster the courage to say "no" to sin, to compromising situations, and to questionable deals and decisions. We have to learn to discipline ourselves to say "no" to wrong habits, even if they're not sinful.
But how do we learn to say "no"?
Here are a few questions to ask yourself before saying "yes.' Otherwise, say "no."
1. Is it sinful?
When we are made to choose between "to sin and not to sin," we should always choose not to sin. Say "no" when saying "yes" means committing or giving approval to sin.
2. It is right?
If both choices are not sinful, we should next choose what is right. For example, it's not sin to lend to a person in need, but if the borrower is known to be a lazy person who depends heavily on others, think twice before saying "yes." Your "no" just might save you from loss and might push the sluggard to work.
3. Will it help others grow?
Think about it, brothers and sisters. Being kind to others is good and pleasing to God, but being too kind – to the point of naïvete and being abused by others – is a problem in itself. Learn to say "no" to others. Maybe your kindness is giving them reason to be abusive.
You have a choice
Friends, you have a choice. God gave us the gift of free will. If God doesn't manipulate or coerce us into making decisions, we shouldn't allow anybody to control our choices either.
We should freely and personally choose to say "yes" to what pleases God and "no" to what He doesn't want. Mastering "no" enables us to focus on God and not in the unnecessary things in life.
