God has predestined all of us to be conformed to the image of His Son, the Lord Jesus Christ. Apparently, since that is the goal of Christianity, we can say that God uses everything in our lives to make us increasingly like Christ. This includes our marriages.
While I thought I knew a lot about love before getting married, I realised there was more to it after the "I do's" at the wedding ceremony. Here are some things God taught me about true love during my first year of marriage.
1) Love never fails. (1 Corinthians 13:8)
Before my wife and I got married, there were some aspects of our personalities that we didn't see. After the wedding, these aspects showed up, and sometimes, what we saw surprised us.
When you vowed "in sickness and in health, for richer or poorer, in good times and in bad" to your spouse, did it really mean accepting their strengths and weaknesses, as well as successes and shortcomings? Yes, it did, and if you truly love your partner, you'll love them to pieces no matter what you see after the wedding, "til' death do us part." Really, there is no other way.
2) Love is not self-seeking. (1 Cor. 13:5)
Have you ever desired to sleep in on the weekends only to find that you can't because your wife needs your help at home? God taught me to look after my wife's interests and not just my own. I call this "a lesson in self-denial."
When I was single, I used to think about my goals, my dreams, my plans. But after marrying, my goals, dreams and plans for myself took on a different direction – towards my wife. I can't dream of being anything without considering how my spouse will be affected by all my decisions.
And while some of the single men and women out there think committing yourself to only one person means a lot less freedom, it actually is more freeing: you get to freely express your love to the person God has entrusted to you for the rest of your life and enjoy a bigger dream, together, than the one you had when you were on your own.
3) God loves me more than I will ever know.
Some husbands might find this admonition weird, but a Godly husband should not: Ephesians 5:25-26 says, "husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her to make her holy, cleansing her by the washing with water through the word."
I admit that loving my wife the way Christ loves the church is one tough challenge. While that is a goal that I try to reach, it is also a reminder of the love of Christ for me: if I find that kind of love very hard to show, then it just shows how much Christ loved me.
Through my marriage, God is teaching me how to be more Christlike and in the process, He also lets me know how much He loves me.
