It is never God's intention for parents to play favourites. He shows this by avoiding favoritism Himself, even to the point of giving up His very own son, Jesus Christ, to die for a race that never deserved mercy and grace from the beginning.
Every time an account of favoritism amongst children happens in the Bible, a household always gets ruined. When Rebekah favored Jacob and helped him trick Isaac into giving his birthright to the wrong son, it brought disunity to the family. When Jacob favored Joseph over his other brothers, it almost killed him. When Peter played favorites in the local church by favoring Jews, He got sharply rebuked by an angry Paul.
Favoritism has immensely negative effects on the affairs of the household or any organization or community. It will always result in ruined relationships. In fact, if you have all intention of ruining your kids' lives (and I'm sure there's no such parent), play favorites.
Love based on qualifications is not healthy
God's template of love has always been encompassing. Titus 2:11 says, "For the grace of God has appeared, bringing salvation for all people." God makes His salvation and love available to all. He never chose whom He would save, but made salvation accessible to everyone and then left it to us to decide whether we desire to follow Him or not.
Love based on qualifications, personalities or preferences can never be a healthy sign. All our children, no matter how difficult of different they are compared to their siblings, deserve and need the same level of love, affection, opportunities and generosity as others.
Favoritism is the greatest impedance to our children in understanding the unconditional love and grace of God. God desires that parents practice equality in treating our children.
God does not play favorites
God never plays favorites. Some people may think that God played favorites when He chose Israel to be His people, but we mustn't forget that God was stern in judgment to them too and even brought prosperity to their enemies.
Matthew 5:45 says, "For he makes his sun rise on the evil and on the good, and sends rain on the just and on the unjust." God makes His grace available to all -- good or bad, Christian or non-Christian. Everything that comes as inequality is a result of man's fallen nature, not God's.
And let us never forget how Jesus portrayed love. He never loved and served based on whether people were rich or poor, immoral or righteous, young or old, smart or average. Jesus loved the sinners, the harassed crowds, the immoral and even the treacherous.
Just as Jesus loves us all without favoritism, we as parents are to be reflections of this unconditional love by loving all our children equally.
