Nine and a half top tips to being a great parent!

|PIC1|Next week sees the start of National Parenting Week and families come in all shapes and sizes. But whatever the shape of your family, you can be a great parent.

To celebrate the launch of the new look inspirational 21 Century Parent DVD by Care for the Family founder Rob Parsons, the charity has come up with some top tips to help you along the journey.

1. Stay calm!
Try to take something positive out of every new experience your kids introduce you to, even if it is a frog in the laundry basket! At least it wasn't two frogs .

2. Be silly once a day
If it's not in your job description to have fun with your children, then it's time to rewrite it! Laugh at their jokes, even if you've heard them before. Be a kid again, sometimes.

3. Don't take yourself too seriously
Character matters more than reputation. You might lose face occasionally, but modelling character means being willing to apologise, being honest about mistakes, forgiving other people for their mistakes, and moving on.

4. Honour their mother or father
This can be hard if you're no longer together as a couple, but even so, honouring their mother or father teaches your children an important lesson in life about respect.

5. Celebrate their differences
Don't compare your children. Each of your children is different and will want to do their own thing. Try to spend time with them individually, whether that's racing them on the Playstation or taking them to Claire's Accessories.

6. Invest in YOUR relationship

If you are in a relationship take some time out for you. If you are a single parent make sure you get some 'me' time. If you are happy research shows that your children will be more contented too.

7. Choose your battles - and stick to them
Always ask yourself, "Is it really worth arguing about this?" If it is, then stick to your guns (unless they give you a very good reason to give in).

8. Let them decide what to do with a day
It might not be an expensive trip out. It might just be going to McDonald's instead of KFC, but give them the choice.

9. Assume the best
Don't over-react; listen to their version of events. Show them that you trust them and you have a much better chance of them trusting you in return.

Tip no 9 1/2: Value your child..

· Validate them
Children can tell whether you think they are important or not by how seriously you take them. If they come to you with a problem, give them your full attention while they talk to you.

· Avoid comparisons
Don't compare them to their friends or siblings. It can undermine their confidence and knock their self-esteem.

· Listen to them
Remember to look at them while they talk - listen with your eyes.

· Understand the power of praise
Catch them doing something right and tell them. To a child, praise can be like rain in a desert.

· Enter into their world
Talk about what interests them. Join in their games. Watch their choice of TV show together. Give them the opportunity to teach you - you may be surprised at what you learn.

For more information about the work of Care for the Family visit www.careforthefamily.org.uk

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