Dear God, please: No more 'hipster' vicars

There's a bit of an obsession with "hipster" vicars in the mainstream media of late – from the Daily Mail to the Evening Standard to Vogue, I seem to come across an article celebrating this "phenomenon", oh, at least every couple of days.

It's as if journalists have suddenly collectively realised that there are some priests who are a) not 95 and b) capable of pulling together a half-decent outfit, and they're excitedly jumping up and down and pointing at these freakish anomalies, shouting: "Look! Look at the cool holy person!" It's been provoking the kind of awestruck wonder normally reserved for seeing a dog walk on its hind legs, or a kitten dressed in a miniature halloween costume.

I have several problems with this sudden spate of stories – the primary one being that these people ARE NOT HIPSTERS (hence why I've been making fast and loose with the inverted commas). That is to say, they only are if you understand the term "hipster" to mean "anyone under the age of 50 who's sporting facial hair".

My friend came across one of these articles and immediately burst out laughing. "What, him?" he asked incredulously, pointing at one of the "hipster vicars" in question. "I know that guy – he's not cool! He's just got a beard!" Herein lies the problem. The humble face rug has become such a status symbol for quirky, trendy urbanites, that anyone who happens to have one is automatically classified as such. But let me clarify: hipsters have beards. Having a beard does not make you a hipster. This is an important distinction to make.

On the other side of the coin, I'm also slightly affronted that it should be so surprising to people that in the sprawling, diverse, complicated make-up of the Church, there are people who have tattoos or collect records or wear vintage cardigans. No, actually, we don't all trudge around in socks and sandals, modelling a pair of NHS specs and waving the King James Bible about. Isn't that stereotype a little tired in 2014?

But mostly, I find it tremendously sad that these articles are trying to contort Christianity to fit into a wholly secular framework – latching onto a surface level, superficial part of someone, and presenting them and their religion based on that. "I mean, obviously it's a totally whack job set of beliefs, but look at that guy rocking a beanie and ironically geeky glasses! And he has a skateboard! I am just sooo loving that!", you can almost hear the writers thinking.

Said the Standard: "It's Christianity – the hipster version. Hipstianity, if you will," as if it's this new, separate denomination based on whether you have the right edgy hairstyle and progressive taste in music. It attempts to make the things that have come to matter most in Western society – appearance, tastes and, above all, being cool – applicable, and even central, to Christianity. 

It is maddeningly reductive, and an inelegant trivialising of a deeply rich and complex faith. Just like women's mags, Tinder and so much of social media, the emphasis in these articles is on how we look from the outside, rather than what's happening on the inside – not what we stand for, believe in, or care about. Take the Standard article, which focuses on Fellowship Church London based in Hackney. While it refers to the church as "non-traditional" and "alternative" – presumably because the congregation meets in a cinema and many of them wear interesting hats – you're left completely in the dark with regards to their theology. This new secular mainstream fascination with "cool Christianity" is about taking the lowest common denominator – the way people look – and dressing the whole thing up as a young, trendy religion, where Jesus barely gets a look in.

I'm sure there are some genuine Christian hipsters out there somewhere who wear normcore, listen to FKA Twigs and post Vice articles on Twitter. There's nothing wrong with them. But unlike mainstream media, which frequently fails to make it out of the shallow end, we need to make sure that we don't fall into the trap of thinking any of that matters. Let's remember what is important, and not worry too much if we don't have the right bone structure to pull off that beard.

related articles
New at church? Here\'s how to get stuck in
New at church? Here's how to get stuck in

New at church? Here's how to get stuck in

Jefferson Bethke: Being a hip church or traditional church doesn't matter, what matters is sacrificial love

Jefferson Bethke: Being a hip church or traditional church doesn't matter, what matters is sacrificial love

That video, and nine other reasons I love Nadia Bolz-Weber

That video, and nine other reasons I love Nadia Bolz-Weber

How not to be a boring vicar (also minister, pastor, preacher, priest and Christian)
How not to be a boring vicar (also minister, pastor, preacher, priest and Christian)

How not to be a boring vicar (also minister, pastor, preacher, priest and Christian)

Which kind of church appeals to Millennials? It\'s not as trendy and modern as you think
Which kind of church appeals to Millennials? It's not as trendy and modern as you think

Which kind of church appeals to Millennials? It's not as trendy and modern as you think

News
Danny Kruger: Britain should be 'confidently Christian'
Danny Kruger: Britain should be 'confidently Christian'

Reform MP Danny Kruger has spoken of the need for Britain to once more assert itself as a  country with a long and rich Christian Heritage.

400 girls 'missing' thanks to sex-selective abortions
400 girls 'missing' thanks to sex-selective abortions

Sex selective abortions appear to be taking place within the Indian community, data suggests.

Community pantries mark a million visits as new research highlights impact on food insecurity
Community pantries mark a million visits as new research highlights impact on food insecurity

Community pantries across the UK have recorded their one millionth visit, as new research suggests the membership-based food model is helping thousands of households reduce food insecurity, cut costs and prevent them from falling into extreme hardship.

Christmas was a mix of joy and hostility for Christians in India
Christmas was a mix of joy and hostility for Christians in India

India has witnessed a blend of joyful Christmas celebrations in many parts of the country, alongside reports of hate, hostility, and attacks on Christians this season, particularly in northern and central regions.