No matter how hard we try to avoid confrontational situations, we'll always come up against people who are difficult to deal with. It's impossible to please everyone all of the time so we will always experience instances where we can't appease a particular person.
Sometimes we'll know when we're due to interact with certain people who we struggle to get on with and we can prepare ourselves for this, but on other occasions we can be caught off guard and things can quickly escalate.
Because we can never be sure when we're going to find ourselves in these kind of situations it's a good idea to think about how we handle challenging people in advance. But where can we find applicable advice on how to successfully manage these incidents in line with our faith? Throughout his lifetime, Jesus had to deal with a lot of difficult people. The different ways in which he navigated these encounters can provide us with tips and tools to incorporate into our own everyday interactions with others.
Be silent
Giving someone who we disagree with the silent treatment can make matters worse but there are times when we are tempted to say things that we know will work against diffusing the confrontation. In these cases it can work best to hold our tongue. Taking time to think before we speak and not just say the first thing that comes to mind in response to what someone else is saying to us will also help us to exercise greater care with our words. "They were using this question as a trap, in order to have a basis for accusing him. But Jesus bent down and started to write on the ground with his finger," (John 8:6) - Jesus goes on to answer the question but his initial reaction is one that we can adapt to reduce conflict. "But he walked right through the crowd and went on his way," (Luke 4:30) - the crowd was angry with Jesus but instead of engaging with them he removed himself from the situation.
Be flexible
The story of the Canaanite woman's faith in Matthew 15 is an example of Jesus' flexibility. Like the disciples, we can be quick to avoid and push away difficult people but by doing so we discard the opportunity we have to resolve the conflict. Being flexible with our responses as well as our time as Jesus is in this example can go a long way in reaching a resolution with a difficult person.
Be loving
This may seem like the most impossible thing to do during times of conflict but Jesus was pretty clear on this. "But I tell you, love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you," (Matthew 5:44). Even at a time when he was suffering, Jesus' thoughts and prayers were with others and he didn't stop showing love to those who saw him as the enemy, "Father, forgive them, for they do not know what they are doing," (Luke 23:34). Most of us won't experience opposition anywhere near the same scale as Jesus did in his lifetime so it's entirely possible for us to exhibit love when dealing with difficult people by drawing on his teaching.
