3 reasons why you should learn to say 'no' to people you keep saying 'yes' to

Some of us need to learn to say "no." This two-letter word is able to do great things for all of us who are unable to use it. I personally have a story to tell about this.

I used to be a person who loved to do favours for almost everybody, and in all honesty had a problem in saying "no" to almost everyone who asked for my help. Whenever a person comes to borrow some money or some other things because they have a need, I can't find the strength to say "no." But when the time comes for them to return what they borrowed, I end up not getting them back.

In short, not knowing how to say "no" cost me more than I ever expected.

Lessons learned

I thought that I was doing people a favour, and that I was doing good. I was wrong. I learned my lessons, and I want to share them to you so that you'd learn to say "no" when you have to, especially to people to whom you always say "yes" to.

Here are some reasons for this:

1. You could spoil them if you don't say 'no'

In all honesty and love, brothers and sisters, realise that when you're a "yes" man, you become the run-to guy of the whole nation. When we become a yes-man to others, we tend to spoil them and teach them that it's okay to rely on others.

Okay, I understand that we were told to love our neighbors. We should, and one way to show that is to teach them to mind their own business and work with their own hands, just like what Paul told us to do (see 1 Thessalonians 4:11-12). And if we are working hard to provide for ourselves, we should help others do that too (see Matthew 22:39).

2. You could indirectly approve of their sin if you don't say 'no'

God hates laziness (see Matthew 25:26-27). We don't only spoil others when we are "yes" people, we also indirectly approve of their laziness. Think about it. You're working hard while they just rely on you.

Another problem here is that if they become abusive, you'll end up a victim of manipulation. Some people love to paint themselves as victims just so that they could earn your favour and possessions (see 1 Thessalonians 2:5). Please, learn to say "no," even if the person asking appears to be angelic. Remember that Satan himself disguises as an angel of light (see 2 Corinthians 11:14).

3. You should prioritise God more than others

Let's face it. Some of us find it hard to say "no" because we fear we might offend people, or because we try to be a good or generous person. Both reasonings are wrong. We should prioritise God more than others, and this includes the area of our love and material possessions.

We can't please people and expect to please God, and vice-versa. When we prioritise God and take care of our families because He wants us to, we will offend some people. When we stand up for what's right, we will offend some people (see James 4:4).

Think about it. Would we rather please men and not learn to say "no" when we have to, or would we rather please God and be a "yes" person only to Him? (see Acts 5:29)

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