It's never easy to lose a loved one to death, but Nabeel Qureshi's wife Michelle is trying to maintain a strong and positive disposition even after she lost her husband to stomach cancer.
Michelle appeared on Nabeel's YouTube channel and shared an inspiring message in the video, "A More Glorious End." It's normal for grieving people to feel some self-pity and despair, but Michelle said she chooses not to because she has God by her side.
"I have chosen not to place upon myself the burdens associated with the terms 'widow' and 'single mom,'" Michelle said. "I am a child of the most high King... It is in that identity that I find strength. It is in that identity that I can find security despite my circumstances."
However, Michelle admitted that she still struggles with her husband's death. At one point, she even prayed for his ressurection until she accepted the fact she can only rely on God.
"Going to God for all of my needs doesn't mean I don't have things to wrestle with," she said. "I said in a video back in May that I had a peace that I believed this would lead to healing. We obviously find ourselves in different circumstances now, and I'm going to have to wrestle with that."
There are still a lot of questions lurking in Michelle's heart, but for now, she chooses to trust God in the direction of her life. Instead of asking, "Why," Michelle would choose to ask, "What now, Lord?" Whatever God's plans are in her life, no matter how painful or difficult its direction might be, Michelle is certain that it's going to "bring much greater glory than the plan I had in mind."
"There's a lot I don't know, but what I do know is that God is big enough to handle our questions and He is compassionate enough to lead us into deeper truths," Michelle said. "I don't understand why and I don't need to."
Before he passed away, Nabeel expressed high hopes for his ministry to continue spreading God's love and message. He encouraged Christians to act on love because "our God is a God of love," whether they be speaking to a Hindu, a Jew, a Muslim, or a fellow believer.
"As you consider my ministry, I hope it leaves a legacy of love, of peace, of truth, of caring for one another. That is my hope and my purpose behind this," he said in a video. "If at any point, I have said anything that seems to contravene that, I do apologize and I hope that is not the legacy that I leave behind."