How to deal with a neighbour who loves to encroach upon your rights and privileges

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Living as a Christian doesn't mean being a pushover. While we are taught that "greater love has no one than this: to lay down his life for his friends" (John 15:13), we are also told that we should love our neighbours only as ourselves (Matthew 22:39). Giving them too much than what you actually should is dangerous because you will teach them to abuse you. Friend, don't do that!

The Bible tells us that the only one whom we should love with all that we are and with all that we have is God alone (Matthew 22:37). When we give others more than what we should, we actually violate God's command. And when we allow others to abuse us and take advantage of our rights and privileges, we are also allowing them to sin as well.

So how do I deal with it?

1. See yourself the way God sees you

First, you need to stop and think about what God thinks of you. You need to realise that Christ has already freed you from slavery to sin and worldliness (Galatians 5:1). Know that when you allow someone, whether it be a family member, a close friend, or a brother in church, to wilfully push you around without the power to say "no," you have already become a slave of that person (see Romans 6:16).

You don't believe me? Try saying "yes" to every demand that an abusive person makes on you. You'll regret it.

2. Set your boundaries

Second, draw your boundary lines. What Christ has died for, don't allow someone else to be "lord." Only Christ has the right to demand your life and everything you have from you because He paid for you with His own blood (see 1 Corinthians 6:20).

Look at your priorities. God has to be first, your family has to be second, and your career or ministry next. When someone tries to take the place of any of those, do your best to break free. Remember that God has done so much to free you for Himself alone, not for someone else (see 2 Corinthians 5:15).

3. Be firm and stand your ground

Third, stand your ground. You need to be firm when you say "no" to someone. When a person doesn't stand his ground and remain firm in declining another person's request, that person will soon give in to it.

Ephesians 6:10-20 says that aside from wearing the armour of God and praying in the Spirit, we also need to stand our ground (v. 14). Having a very good set of armour but not having a steadfast character will not ensure victory. Soldiers who have the best guns still need their courage, determination and wits to win a war. In the same way, we need strength of character to stop others from abusing us.