XXX Church explains why pornography just kills intimacy in relationships

(PHOTO: Pexels)

Despite repeated warnings against the use of porn, many people still fall susceptible to its trap. The sad reality is - once people start using porn, they find themselves unable to quit the bad habit.

Jeff Bethke, author of the book, "Love That Lasts," provided several more reasons why people should turn their backs on porn. He shared a passage from his book with XXX Church, an online ministry dedicated to helping people with porn and sex addictions.

Bethke said he was a porn user himself once, and constant viewing of porn unleashed "monster-like qualities" in him. "I became incredibly selfish. Fast tempered. Had a horrible view of women that played itself out in every single relationship," he said.

The author likened porn to cancer because it is destructive to souls, marriages, relationships, jobs, and personal lives. In fact, porn, together with constant use of smartphones and social media, are warping people's brains and messing around their personal lives.

"It's not a stretch to say we are remaking humanity in some regard, and not in a good way. We are fundamentally rewiring the human race. And the biggest hit we are taking — not only with porn or technology but also in how they interact with each other — is the death of intimacy," he said.

Bethke said porn is the very antithesis to intimacy, because it robs people of the chance to express true love. Porn robs people of vulnerability and nakedness, and it builds a wall between them and their loved ones because they hide their true selves whenever they watch.

"True intimacy involves an exchange," he explained. "Someone offers vulnerability, and the other honors that vulnerability. Then the other person reciprocates that vulnerability, creating a beautiful cycle. And that bond is exclusive and hidden; it's only for the two people to behold and be a part of. But it's the very antithesis of intimacy when one person in the relationship is secretly inviting others into that space through porn."

For those who want to kick off their porn habit, Carl Thomas from XXX Church wrote on their blog that they should not feel weighed down by their sins because Jesus Christ already offered to take it all away.

"Jesus did not die so we all can live in our own little prisons of brokenness and isolation. When He took on your sin, He also took all the shame that comes with it," he said.

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