Why Syria's refugees need trauma counselling as much as food and shelter

Saraa Aref and three of her six children in Irbid, Jordan.Clare Kendall/Bible Society

Thirty-year-old Saraa is crying. She lives in one room in Irbid in Jordan with her six children. That includes twins aged nine months.

She fled her home in Deraa in Syria, in a bid to save her children's lives. She's done that, but at huge emotional cost.

"The war destroyed me emotionally," she says. "When I first came here I was so broken and so aggressive. I had no-one to turn to and no-one to talk to.

"I used to scream at my children and I used to hit them sometimes. I'd hit my 12-year-old and then I'd go and cry in the corner, telling myself, 'Why did I hit her?'"

Saraa is among tens of thousands of people who have taken part in trauma counseling in Jordan, run by Bible Society volunteers.

The scheme was first devised by the American Bible Society in 2001. It now runs in 76 countries (including Jordan and now Lebanon) and it is in 183 languages. It's used by more than 100 different organisations.

In group sessions people look at big questions such as "Why is there suffering?", "Where is God in suffering?", rape as a weapon of war and how to care for traumatised children.

They also have the chance to talk about their own experiences – perhaps for the first time – and to look at what the Bible has to say about all of these things.

Naomi Dunn, Bible Society's international advocacy support officer says: "Trauma healing works because it helps people find hope in their darkest moments. It's not about burying the pain or forgetting what has happened, but about building a new identity that acknowledges the past without having to be defined by it, and then looking ahead to a better future.

"The Bible is vital to this as it helps people find meaning and purpose, knowing that they are loved and not alone."

In Irbid, Saraa is one of 10,000 people who have taken part in the trauma healing programme over the last three years.

We sit on the floor in her one-room home. I ask her what difference it has made.  

"I'm a lot more calm and have more patience," she says. "It affected me greatly, just knowing how to deal with my anger.

"At first we used to ask God, 'Why are you leaving us? Why are you putting us through this?' But I've learned that God will get us through this in the end. He cares for us."

Everyone who wants to comes along to the group sessions, whether they are Christian or Muslim. Jordan's population is 97 per cent Muslim and three per cent Christian. So working with people from both backgrounds is completely normal to the Bible Society of Jordan.

In fact, it's very obvious that the counseling is not about evangelism or even faith, it's about pouring out your heart, being listened to and finding hope.

Trauma healing facilitator Margaret Khabbaz sits with eight-year-old Tariq.Clare Kendall/Bible Society

The Bible Society of Jordan's programme co-ordinator for trauma healing, Haya Khoury, says: "Trauma healing is much needed. The refugees have been through so much. They have been raped, threatened, their houses have been destroyed.

"I imagine myself living a good life and then living in a camp in another country, not having any food. How traumatised can you get?

"The need for trauma healing is as big as the need for food and shelter."

The worst thing for Saraa is that she doesn't have her parents with her. They are in their fifties but Saraa refers to them as being "old".

"My children are young: my parents are old. As soon as the bombing started I left my parents behind and came here alone with my children."

With six children to bring up, she's desperate for her mother's help. "My most important wish is for me to see my Mum once more," she says. "But I am thankful that we came to Jordan and found good people to support and welcome us."