How to date with holiness and godliness


The modern dating world is getting crazier by the way, and for Christians who want to date with Godliness, it can be a bit of a challenge as well. There is pressure to break free from the modern dating culture, but there is also pressure inside you to find someone who you might spend the rest of your life with. How can you keep up without sacrificing your values? Here are tips.

Honor God and Honor Yourself

The first golden rule is to always honor God in your life. The next golden rule is to honor yourself. Why are these rules so important? First, if God is in the center of your life, you will be committed in following all his rules. By honoring God at all times, you will not lose sight of your values and morals, just for the sake of having a boyfriend or girlfriend around. 

Next, if you honor yourself, you will know your worth and not just date any person out there. Respect begets respect. If you want others to respect you, always respect yourself first. Moreover, in Christian dating, respect for oneself and faith to God are two very attractive qualities. Keep this verse in mind, it can apply to both men and women.

Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting; but a woman who fears the LORD is to be praised. - Proverbs 31:30

Always Be Confident

In relation to the point above, when you know your self-worth, your confidence will not waver. Being confident is important in Christian dating. For one, you must be confident that the Lord will hold your hand throughout the process and will help you resist any temptation. And next, you are also confident in yourself that you will not cave in to societal pressures of dating.

When challenges and temptation come your way, you have to be headstrong. The devil can see any sign of weakness and will continue prowling on that until it wins. Confidence in yourself that you can resist the temptation of the flesh will lead you to a holy and godly dating process. Remember, confidence isn't just about the looks. What always matters is what's in your heart. And if God is in your heart, your confidence must be 101 percent.

Let your adorning be the hidden person of the heart with the imperishable beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which in God's sight is very precious. 1 Peter 3:3-4

Do Not Negotiate

If you're looking for a Christian boyfriend or girlfriend, both of you must acknowledge from the get-go that there are things that are non-negotiable in your dating relationship. This includes emotional things like being too dependable on one another, lack of respect and trust with one another, and physical things like sexual immorality and physical intimacy. If you observe that your dating partner cannot commit to this, that's a sign that your relationship will not be grounded in biblical principles. This also means that this person isn't the one God intended you to be with.

It is important that when you're dating, you always pray for wisdom. When you're attracted to someone, or even when you're falling in love with someone, you automatically become blinded. There are things you don't see or do see but choose to ignore. Again, do not negotiate, especially if it displeases God.

But the wisdom from above is first of all pure (undefiled); then it is peace-loving, courteous (considerate, gentle). It is willing to yield to reason, full of compassion and good fruits; it is wholehearted and straightforward, impartial and unfeigned (free from doubts, wavering, and insincerity). - James 3:17

In the modern dating culture, dating is a game people play. There are too many mind games, which leads people to always doubt and feel insecure. Bear in mind that if you're feeling confused or insecure, this isn't a relationship for you. What you deserve is clarity and confidence. Let's not sugarcoat it, you will meet several ungodly men and women out there. However, you must also trust that there are Godly men and women out there, and one of those is meant to be with you forever.