Tulisa on her trial: 'I kept saying, God won't forsake me'

Published 04 August 2014  |  

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Tulisa Contostavlos, second from left, says she's "very religious"

Former X-Factor judge and N-Dubz singer Tulisa Contostavlos opened up about her faith in a revealing interview with The Guardian this weekend.

Following the collapse of her drugs trial she told the newspaper, "I'm very religious."

Contostavlos was accused of brokering a deal involving the supply of cocaine in an elaborate scheme set up by the Sun newspaper's Mazher Mahmood, dubbed the 'fake sheikh'.

The case was eventually thrown out by Judge Alistair McCreath, however, after suspicion arose that Mahmood had manipulated evidence.

Speaking publicly for the first time following the ordeal, Contostavlos has revealed that it was her faith that helped her get through the trial, despite believing she would be found guilty.

"My heart told me: there's no way this can happen. I'm very religious and I kept saying, God won't forsake me. My head was telling me, if they're allowed to take it this far, to tell so many lies, God knows where it can go...I was preparing for prison," she said.

Two years ago, following the leak of a sex-tape online, the singer revealed that she'd found faith and declared, "My naughty days are firmly in the past".

Now that her latest scandal is over, Contostavlos is free to move on with her life, though she's lost a year's earnings through being unable to work, and has lost a lot of weight. She has also admitted to "waking up screaming" in the middle of the night.

"I don't think anybody's made the sign of the cross as many times in one year," she added, noting that she has been praying "at least three times a day on a good day," and "all day" during harder times.

The Daily Mail noted that Contostavlos clutched "a small image of religious idols" while giving evidence in the dock, and she says she's even prayed for Mahmood – the man who set her up.

"I reached a point when I thought, no, I'm not stooping to your level. I'm better than this," she recalled.

"I looked at him and thought, he's not worthy of these emotions, he's draining me. I said, right, you're going to have to do it, and I was battling with myself, then I sat there and did it – I said a prayer for him."

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