Battling Depression After Loss: How You Can Grieve Without Becoming Depressed

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Grief and depression are not one and the same thing. While you might feel the same way in both scenarios, there are many differences between the two. When you lose a loved one, a business venture, property or anything of high importance to you, it's okay to grieve. In fact, grief is the goal, not depression.

Too often some Christians might think that we shouldn't grieve when we lose something because our joy should be in Christ, but that's not necessarily the case. While we do put our joy in God, God primarily lets His joy flow through people. To lose those channels can be painful. Even Jesus grieved when He lost a dear friend in Lazarus, whom he even brought back to life after (John 11:35).

But in grieving, depression is no necessity. The main difference between the two is our thinking. We can grieve with hope and gratefulness in our hearts for what God has given to us although it had ended. On the other hand, depression happens in the absence of hope and gratefulness. Grief leads to healing while depression only breaks us little by little.

Here are some tips to grieve without falling into depression.

1. Don't Rush the Grieving Process

Grief is not meant to be rushed. It's slow, circular and sometimes even cruel, but it is necessary. Grief happens only because there was extreme value to what we lost, and grief makes us appreciate and cherish that value more and more. The grieving process can take months, even years to finish.

The key is to never have to grieve alone. We have family and friends to surround and support us and we have the best comforter in God. 2 Corinthians 1:5 tells us, "For as we share abundantly in Christ's sufferings, so through Christ we share abundantly in comfort, too."

2. Look Back and Be Thankful, Not Remorseful

Grief can lead us to gratitude, not remorse. This happens as we continue to look back at the moments we had with loved ones we lost and remember the value provided by things we have lost. There is a fine line between grief and greed, and greed is what leads us to depression. Depression seeks selfishly to wish our way was done, only to be disappointed because not everything went our way.

3. Look to the Hope in Christ

The saving grace of God is the source of great hope for us all most especially in times of grieving. It reminds us that sorrow and sadness happens only as a very short and even insignificant season in the eternal life we now have in Christ.

There is always reason to hope in God and in the good, pleasing and perfect will He has for us all. Romans 8:28 assures us, "And we know that for those who love God all things work together for good,[a] for those who are called according to his purpose."