3 reminders why we must move past self-condemnation

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Sister Sister actress and The Real co-host Tamera Mowry-Housley has spoken about her struggle with self-condemnation.

Speaking on the U.S. talk show, Mowry-Housley said, "Sometimes when you do something that you know maybe you shouldn't have done, it's hard to move on...I have a very long story about what I needed to forgive myself about. You guys all know that I made a pact to myself to stay a virgin before I got married and I tried for a very, very, very long time."

The actress and talk show host, who is a Christian, was visibly affected by her past. She broke down in tears as she attempted to share her story with her co-hosts and members of the audience.

She spoke of how she broke her vow and had struggled to forgive herself.

Mowry-Housley's story is one that many Christians will be able to relate to.

Here are three reminders why it's essential to work on moving past self-condemnation.

1. It prevents us from pursuing a healthy relationship with God

Have you ever noticed that when children do something they know they shouldn't have done, they begin to act differently? We see this not just in toddlers and teens but in adults, too. We see this in our friends who avoid our calls because they know they've let us down. We see this in our colleagues who don't reply to our emails because they've failed to deliver. The list of scenarios goes on.

When we break a promise we've made with God, we tend to adopt this same sort of behaviour. We might cease praying because we feel ashamed, or stop attending study and small groups or even church because we feel like a hypocrite and less of a Christian.

All this weakens our relationship with Him. Without talking to Him regularly and listening to what He has to say, we lose touch with who He is and who we are.

2.We stop being an example to others

Imagine if all Christians who'd ever done something wrong forever beat themselves up about it, deemed themselves incapable of receiving Christ's love and suspended their faith indefinitely. There'd be no Christians left.

As uninspiring as failing might seem to you at first, your ability to bounce back because of your faith and go on to resist the same sin is hugely inspiring to others. Even if it takes you a few tries before you can completely put a particular self-condemnation and temptation behind you, you'll still be able to motivate someone else to do the same.

When you continuously self-condemn, you discourage others who have a similar experience or will have the same experience in the future. If there's no hope for you, why should there be any for them?

3.It restricts us from believing in regeneration and redemption

Jesus died for you. God gave His only Son for you. Regeneration and redemption aren't God's gifts reserved for someone else but you. They are yours to accept and enjoy.

To believe that accepting Jesus as our saviour regenerates our spirit and enables us to be redeemed means believing this when things go wrong, not just when we're pretty positive that we're behaving like the model Christian. The whole point is that we need to be renewed and saved because we failed.

Putting our sin behind us requires us to abstain from committing that sin and allowing it to haunt us. So, if we really believe in the principles of regeneration and redemption – two central elements of our faith – then we have to embrace them when we need them.